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What's to Like About Retirement


Question:  How many days in a week?

Answer:  6 Saturdays, 1 Sunday


Question:  When is a retiree's bedtime?

Answer:  Three hours after he falls asleep on the couch.


Question:  How many retirees to change a light bulb?

Answer:  Only one, but it might take all day.


Question:  Why don't retirees mind being called Seniors?

Answer:  The terms comes with a 10% discount.


Question:  Among retirees what is considered formal attire?

Answer:  Tied shoes.


Question:  Why do retirees count pennies?

Answer:  They are the only ones who have the time. 


Question:  What is the common term for someone who enjoys work and refuses to retire?

Answer:  Nuts.


Question:  Why are retirees so slow to clean out the basement, attic, or garage?

Answer:  They know that as soon as they do, one of their adult kids will want to store stuff there. 


Question:  What do retirees call a long lunch?

Answer:  Normal.


Question:  What is the best way to describe retirement?

Answer:  The never-ending coffee break.


Question:  What's the biggest advantage of going back to school as a retiree?

Answer:  If you cut classes, no one calls your parents. 


Question:  Why does a retiree often say he doesn't miss work, but misses the people he used to work with? 

Answer:  He is too polite to tell the whole truth. 

DOES THIS SOUND FAMILIAR?


Have you ever been guilty of looking at others your

own age and thinking surely I can't look that old.

Then....you'll love this one.


My name is Mary and I was sitting in the waiting room

for my first appointment with my new dentist.

I noticed his DDS diploma on the wall showing his full name.

Suddenly I remembered a tall, handsome, dark-haired guy with

the same name had been in my high school some 50 odd years ago.


Could he be the same guy that I had a secret crush on way back then?

When I saw him, I quickly discarded any such thought.  This balding

gray haired man with the deeply lined face was way too old

to have been my classmate.


After he examined my teeth, I asked if he had attended Mounds View

High School. " Yes, yes I did I'm a Mustang" he said with pride.

When did you graduate? I asked.  He answered in 1960..why do you ask?


You were in my class! I exclaimed.


He looked at me closely and then that ugly, old, bald headed, wrinkled faced,

fat-a..ed, gray-haired, decpreit SOB asked, "What did you teach??"

Do you know your MVHS trivia?

  1. What was the name of our mascot? (Melvin the Mustang)
  2. What was the full name of our librarian? (Olive Ronholm)
  3. Who did we play for Homecoming our senior year and what was the slogan? (Columbia Heights - Musthang Heights)
  4. How much did lunch tickets cost? (25 cents - I think -  maybe they were 35 cents??)
  5. Where was the Senior Class Trip held?  (Bus trip to Lake City and dinner at some night club)  (Kirsten LeVander and Al Grahn won the dance contest)
  6. Where was the Senior Picnic held? (Sucker Creek Park)
  7. Who were The Clippers? (Craig Scherfenberg, Jack Kollodge, Bob Pine)
  8. What was the name of the social event at the Y?  (The Deal)
  9. Who were our foreign exchange students and where were they from?  (Inci Trak & Toshihiko Hayashi from Turkey & Japan)
  10. What are the words to the Mounds View Rouser?
  11. What was the name of the prom? (Bali Hai)

  12. Name The Newspaper and The Yearbook.  (The Viewer & The Vista)
  13. What was the dress code? (Skirts & dresses for girls - unless we had a "slack day" and for boys belts were required)
  14. Who was our class president? (Donald Wagner)
  15. Who was our class secretary? (Donna Poshek)
  16. Who was president of the "M" club?  (Dan McNeil)
  17. On Snow Day the Psycho-Dynamics defeated The Blockbusters in a game of what?  (Broomball-Broom Hockey)
  18. What were the names of our cheerleaders?  ( Donna Poshek, Nancy Barnum, Kathy Swensen, Sharon Milton, Karen Selleck, Judy Newell, & Connie Eicher)
  19. What is the real name of our classmate who writes murder mysteries using the pen name of Nora Barker?  (Jackie Nelson)‚Äč

MVHS Trivia/Jokes